My new term specifically for shite that happens and qualifies for fmylife.com.

There must be something wrong with me when I can't even get a commitment for a picnic down. I spent about three pointless hours at Mission Bay today waiting for people to show up and when I get on the bus to go home, someone texts to ask, "Hey r u still there? My bike broke down but its okay now." That would have been helpful THREE HOURS AGO when you first found out that your battery cable was shot instead of me waiting in the blistering sun on the beach for nothing! I had to lug a heavy picnic basket around the city today, did you think that was going to be fun? 

I've got a bit of sunburn now, since I forgot to put on sunblock in a rush to get out of the house so I wouldn't be late.

I just feel really bad right now. I could have done other things today instead of watching all these couples walk on the beach, get shat on by a seagull and eat cold pasta.

~doublesharp

ps. Isn't that funny, I've compared watching couples walk on the beach to getting shat on and eating cold pasta. I am but resentful ay.

My mind is in two decades right now. One part of me is firmly lodged in the first decade of my life, where everything was free and available, and i had the luxury of security, knowing where my next meal was coming from and that all I had to do was go to school and be a kid.

The other part is stuck in a place I am a tad reluctant to explore. Right now I've got separate tabs open on TradeMe (New Zealand's version of Ebay - fantastic place, you can find everything for cheap!) all of them on places to stay. I'm looking for a flat to move into by the end of this year or early next year. Nic will be coming here next year and there really just isn't enough room for all of us. So as early as now, i'm looking for a place to stay. Sophie says I can live with her if she can find a place to stay in the city centre but I'm trying to look for a place of my own as well.

Another thing I'm looking for on TradeMe is a job. I need some way to finance my little vices here (books mainly, as well as the occasional drink-up with mates) and it would look great on my resume. I found a sales and marketing position with this company - it looks promising, keeping appendanges crossed for this one.

I guess I cannot afford to be carefree anymore, so I'm going to try and enjoy this time I have right now where I am still living with a family where there is someone to take care of me and a cat who will share my bed with me and leave loving scratches on my arms.

And to think that I was so excited to be an adult because it was cool. Right now being a kid seems like a pretty sweet deal.

~doublesharp

At the moment I'm on semester break after having finished a week of exams, essay writing and studying. May I never have to go through the horror of remembering the names of five ethical theorists along with the theories that they supposedly authored while trying to apply them in an obscure case study that deals with frozen bull sperm. Heehee, got you there. It was still shit though. Writing my assignment essay was somewhat better; I just had to watch Juno four times in a row to get the narrative structure down. Suck on that, Sarah!

Anyway, this is me when I'm more relaxed. I just finished doing the dishes and cleaning my room, so I now have the luxury of doing whatever I want. I could go out later on into the city, or I could go for a runaround outside because it's not too cold. But right now, I managed to unearth Mary's copy of the first season of Flight of the Conchords. Everyone's been bugging me to watch this, saying that it would be a good introduction to Kiwi humour, so here I am guys. Watching Bret and Jemaine sing about lasagne.

"You can't break my heart, it's liquid. It melted when I met you." ~Jemaine from Flight of the Conchords.

Send me emails people!

~doublesharp

Her Fairy Godmother would have been too busy playing stylista to go shopping anyway.

This Saturday, I'll be attending a dress-up birthday party. As most of you know, going shopping for an appropriate outfit has always been a thorn in the proverbial paw where I'm concerned. It just seems like every single fucking thing in the shops look the same; the cut, the colour, the beading 'round the ruched bodice...seriously people. I know we're all for being unique and ourselves, but as far as mainstream goes, we're all the same coloured fish swimming in the exact same direction. For those of us who are clinging to the rocks by the banks, there is only so much you can take before you throw yourself out of the water and die a flopping death. I am not going to be that fish, dammit!

So I've learned to simply settle for whatever dress fits, never being so bold as to demand that a certain style be in a particular size. Today was different though. I was at LynnMall looking for a dress, running the usual rounds of going into every single boutique that offered clothes that did not have buckles and studs around the hem. I even came across a few bondage-type dresses (v. tempting as they were 30% off and they might come in handy when I feel the urge to dress like a kinky Morticia Addams, but I digress). I was starting to get the run-down feeling again of having to pick something I didn't really feel good in because it was the only one in my size when I came across the store called Blueberry.

I walked in with Tita, and had a look around. Up on the wall was this one dress that caught my eye, and the owner said that she had only one left in a size 12. It was above my budget though, so I looked for something more in my price range. I did find something, a teal georgette piece with leather detail around the empire waist. It was cute and in budget, but I wasn't feeling it. Tita pushed me to try on the other dress, so I went for it. You can dream for free right? 

When I turned around to check it out in the mirror, it was like looking at someone else. Like Cinderella after the Fairy Godmother bippity-boppity-booed her into her ball gown. Then my heart sank because I knew that it did look so much better but I couldn't buy it without feeling boatloads of guilt. Tita reasoned though that it would be a good dress to have on hand for when I had other semi-formal occasions to attend, kind of like an investment piece. The owner of the store nodded, and said she'd take ten dollars off the tag price. I was sold.

Here it is!

So I will bore you all with everything that's been happening!

First off, I'm turning into a real live egg. I gained about 4kg since I got here, eating like mad. Granted, it's only recently that I've been putting on weight like mad because it's winter but still! It's a sign that I have to consign myself to the inevitable gym membership as it is too cold to run around outside. Cassi's always there anyway, so I guess it won't be boring. Thank goodness AUT has a decent gym with cheap rates for its students, otherwise I would have to power walk around Albert Park to take off the jiggle that's formed around my ass.

I got my 18+ card last Saturday. Since I don't have another form of ID (at least one that I'm willing to lose; hence I don't bring my passport to a pub) I had to apply for it. I used it yesterday, when we went to Vesbar for Anthony's birthday drink up. I look like a hungover bum on my photo, red hair and all. The semi-smile on the photo is from when I was flipping AD off for making me laugh. You're not supposed to be smiling in your photo, but he wasn't making it easy.

( Do you like it? )

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I got published again in debate magazine, this time it as a full-length feature article! Totally made my week.


Curly Joe hugged me too, it was awesome.


How are you guys doing? Email me what's going on back there

~doublesharp

ps. ohmygods I so read about the Ryan/Juday wedding. A part of me is happy it finally happened, but another part of me goes, "Oh well. That's him gone." Why is everybody getting married all of a sudden? 

I would have wanted a more glamorous group doing the soundtrack to my current life (A. Lloyd Webber + David Sedaris for choice lyrics) but pop culture  seems to have captured it more accurately than a proper scoring ever would.

Track One: You're So Damn Hot

Yeah, that's what I think of you. Don't ask me when it happened, one look into your brown eyes and a ruffle of your thick, curly hair later and I was besotted like the eleven year old I once was. Don't ask me either why I'm attracted to you, you jock. I normally want more brains on my guy, but lately I've been checking you out from all possible angles. I think I owe rugby one for handing you that tight body.


Track Two: Here It Goes Again

And just when I thought I had my emotions back in control, my feelings go spiraling out of my grasp. Do you know, that my jaw really did fall slack when you practically TONGUED your fruit cups? It's getting distracting watching you eat them like that, I'm so tempted to bring you a pack of plastic spoons just so that you will not stop me from having my lunch in uninterrupted peace. At least I haven't seen you lick creamed rice off your finger yet, I think I'd just get up and leave. I like talking to you too, you're so enthusiastic when you speak about things and you have such an infectious energy. I also like how you take the beanies off my head and try them on. Fuck it, I think I like you.


Track Three: Do What You Want

I thought only heiresses got birthday weekends. I don't know why I was dreading turning 19 so much; it turned out to be heaps of fun! First was Thursday afternoon, where my classmates surprised me with a cake during our break in the lounge. It was real Italian tiramisu from Giapo's, complete with a little candle shaped like a star. I made a wish before blowing it out, wishing with all my heart that I could keep these friends forever. We ate it up of course, for who can resist the charms of tiramisu longer than an hour? That night, I went to watch Stomp at the Civic; it was mean! I marvel at the creativity of the human mind; who knew you could make music out of PVC piping and the kitchen sink? The lighter show was choice too, especially when they all started clicking the lighters in a beat. Fun, fun stuff.

Spent Friday doing laundry (more like soaking my duvet cover after the cat threw up on it) and random housekeeping. I made a cheesecake and managed to set off the smoke alarm baking the crust. Ah well, I'm sure even Julie LeClerc burned a couple of of crusts before she became Madame Perfection. One thing I learned about crusts: Do not use Ginger Nuts in the place of graham crackers. They are harder than the ice penguins slide on in the Atlantic.

Friday night was by all accounts, a choice evening. Met up with Grant, Sophie, Nick, Daniel and Anthony at Shadows where we waited for AD and Micah to show up. A Black Russian and my very first 40 ounce (Micah finished it, bless him) later and we trooped off to Honey on High Street to crash a party. Nobody really cared that we had crashed though, because there were at least three other people who were celebrating their birthdays as well. Danced a lot and even started a limbo line! Left before midnight in search of Belgian beer.

Which we never found because the bar was packed. Off to Burger King for some grease for those who needed it. Scabbed heaps of chips off everybody.

Last stop of the evening was the Brooklyn Bar on Queen street for a final round of drinks. I got a Fairy Godfather cocktail while everybody else had a beer. AD dropped me home, but not without getting lost. K'Road is a scary place to get lost, since you don't actually know who is a genuine female. Thank goodness AD knew not to stop and ask for directions. Brr.

Saturday night was another dinner party, this time for me and Tita Abet. Plenty of food and karaoke! Sunday night was yet another lunch, this time at Tita Melba's house. She gave me an ice cream cake, it was so good! They aren't kidding when they say that New Zealand makes the best ice cream.

Thank you everybody, for all the wishes and pressies, photos and prayers, free drinks and birthday songs. It doesn't matter that I'm so far from home because with people like you, I don't even feel the distance. I love you all to bits and pieces!

~doublesharp

ps. For photos, check out my Multiply!

So in a week, I turn 19.

I can't believe that it's already been a year since my 18th. This time last year I was in Cebu, trying to review a little for the IELTS, while bumming around the house. Now I'm in my room in New Zealand, waiting for a load of laundry to finish in the dryer while watching episodes of the Big Bang Theory. Man, how things have changed.

I remember when I turned 13, how excited I was to finally be a "teen". I've spent my teen years well, high school taking up most of it. It was a good time though, because that's where I met my closest mates, gotten into some funny situations and overall picked up a lot of life gems. Yet I cannot help but feel that I'm not through with teendom yet. There's still so much to do!Conversely, I don't think I'm ready to go into the twenties. It sounds like such a lofty and responsible age, twenty, and goodness knows I'm nowhere near ready to be categorised as a young adult instead of a teenager. But a lot can happen to a year. We'll see what happens.

They say that picking presents is difficult, that you really have to know the person well before you can pick a good prezzie for them. Can I make it less of a chore for you?

1. Any hat, absolutely any hat.
2. A gift check to Borders
3. A gift check to Smith and Caughey's, particularly the makeup section
4. MAC pigment in Old Gold
5. Hugh Jackman

Have a good weekend guys!

~doublesharp

A while ago I was very nearly tempted to get a Facebook account. The sign-up page was right before me, my fingers  already typing in all the necessary information, all automatic muscle movement. It was right before I clicked on the 'sign up' button did I stop to think about what I was signing up to. I like to keep my life open for others to follow, but to a certain degree. Sure, what's already online can be subject to (possible) objectification by complete strangers but I control what gets to go up right? I already have Multiply for all my photos, a blog to keep thoughts on and a Friendster account that hasn't seen the light of day in ages. I just feel that adding a Facebook account lessens any modicum of control I have over my life online. And gods knows, there could be some pretty incriminating stuff off Facebook that I do not want to encounter. Photo tagging may be a useful son of a bitch but damned if photos of a beer keg and myself surface.*

But it's a great way to keep in touch with your mates, you all argue. Your own dad is on Facebook, why aren't you? ** To that I say: If you really need to know what's happening with my life, and if you are of any importance to me, you would know how to reach me. It's such a nuisance to constantly log in and find out that people have been scribbling on your wall and sending you love bites or shite like that. If I want you to scribble on a surface, it'll be on a check for something. Love bites must be given upon mutual agreement only.

So now you know how I feel about Facebook. Don't get me started on Twitter.

~doublesharp

In Other News (ion):  I just purchased a ticket to a comedy show called Full English, part of the New Zealand Comedy Festival. It's on next Saturday, so at least I'll have something to review for debate magazine the following week.

I'm also planning to enter a makeup look contest on YouTube. The theme is 'flowers', so I'll be doing a look inspired by two-tone hydrangeas. Now to find a willing victim -er- model.

I had an internal dialogue with myself yesterday. In Bisaya.



*Not that there are any. Just saying.
**This is true. Go look him up. 

In the span of less than five hours, I have managed to consume:

• Rice with chicken and veggies all smothered in tomato sauce
• A big as serving of fettucine and chicken with a green salad on the side
• Four slices of Vegemite and spread
• One Mallowpop
• A couple (three? four?) wedges

Tubbytown, here I come. I don't understand why I was so ravenous today! I had a decent brekkie (yoghurt and cereal) and lunch (item #1 on the list), so I don't get why my body suddenly developed the appetite of a bear before it goes into hibernation. I'm usually pretty good at keeping my appetite in check but today it was a complete turnaround. Total self-control fail. My dad reckons it's just the cold weather causing me to eat so much, but still. If I keep eating like I did today I will probably look like a beached whale. Ugh, the image.

I managed to dig something up on YouTube though. It's such a huge fail, it made me feel better about eating so much today. It's the introduction of Little Lulu, but somebody tried to write down the lyrics to it. I reckon that the poor soul who attempted this feat was just listening to the lyrics and writing down whatever sounded right. Enjoy!





And here are the lyrics that were posted:

Oh, Lulu!
Little Lulu, Little Lulu, with freckles on her chin
Always in then now the trouble, the mostly how is in!
Using next neck time for the tale of your kind
Using Mom's lipstick for the letters you write!
Little Lulu, Little Lulu, there's know one like the smart
Cause a matter what you doing? You do it make your heart!
Shining girls are dancing where's the smile in your ride?
Well can be the forward do your neck's surprise
What a surprise!
Oh, the Mom is said I'm 30, is really after 10
Look's like Lulus and repairing in the game!
No, we why? (Why?)
It knows it trueloo
And you very hard to take Little Lulu
We love you
Just the same-the-same!
Little Lulu, we love you
Loo... just... the... same!
Luluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!


Hahahahahahaha

~doublesharp